Have you not experienced a day when you started off badly, you wake up with a start from a nightmare, and while staring at bags under your eyes in the mirror you remember that you have set up an early meeting at 8am and 8 am has passed half-hour ago! You rush to the office, to be greeted by the secretary of your boss who said with a smirk on her face, "Boss has been looking for you!" You enter your boss's office, and he sits behind his desk glaring at you, and he send you off to the airport to pick up his visiting relative, and to take the relative on a city tour...and so on, and on...and by the time you arrive back at your office to do what you should have done for the day it is 9pm! You are exhausted. A busy day, but nothing got done!
A day you feel pretty bad about! You wish, how nice to have a cheerleader who can make you feel better~!
Well, what are you supposed to do if most of your working days are days such as above. Hurried, rushed, too much to do but being diverted to do something totally unrelated to your work. You are busy, but you feel you have not achieved, not recognized, and taken for granted!
Such person in an office is what I call a 'Utility person'. Normally of nice disposition, positive attitude, never say no, and eager to please everyone except himself or herself. Often taken advantage off, and just as often been overlooked for promotion and recognition!
You thought the problem is the company, so you resign. Two months after you have started on a new job, in a new company, the same things happen again. You repeat the process, and after fifth jobs in five different companies within the same number of years, you come to a realization - it is you who is the problem!
You even go to see a Bomoh, to mandi bunga, thinking that some evil spirit has gotten into your body. The Bomoh goes into a trance, squeezes your toes, and after some pain and a few drops of tears, you coughed up RM150 'pengeras'!
Nothing change!
Here are my diagnosis of the problem:
- You need a vision for your self ; dreams which you want to pursue
- You need to believe in yourself; confident to share your vision with your boss and others around you.
- You need some fire in your belly ; courage & enthusiasm.
1. Personal Vision
Unless you know what you want to achieve, there is no way for others to know. If you don't know where you are going, people can sense that, and they will start pushing you in directions which benefit them and NOT you.
Hence, you feel that everyone uses you! A clear vision provides a direction and purpose.
2. A clear purpose, will provide you reasons to believe. It motivates you to achieve. Take the first step towards your vision, then the next step. Every step you move forward will help you feel more confident about your ability. Take small steps if necessary, but move forward. Sometimes, you may have to take two steps back before you can move three steps forward. Be flexible to do so. That is part of learning process.
Celebrate your own successes. Be enthusiastic about each achievement. Stand up and say out loud, "Yabada badoooo!! I have doen it!"
If people ask, simply shrug your shoulder and say, 'I have completed one more task, and boy...that feels good!"
3. Be courageous to speak up! One of the most glaring differences between a Melayu executive and a Non Melayu executive is 'Courage to speak up!' Melayu thinks too much, say too little. Melayu tend to process their thinking in their head, and dismisses the idea before the idea has a chance to be heard by others. This self-sabotage is a common syndrome amongst Melayu graduates, especially if they are the first generation graduate. Worry not - Speak Up! "Hentam jer!"
Most Melayu who are successful are able to express their ideas and opinions.
Be enthusiastic, and energertic. The way you walk, sit, even dressed communicate about your state of being. Enthusiasm is contagious. Everyone wants to be lifted up and not be brought down by your depression. If you feel depressed, find a private room and lock yourself in for a while until you are able to smile and face the world!
"I have done a heck of a lot today, and I feel good about it!" I am signing off and decide to write this article to share how I feel before I leave the office. "I feel good!"
I am my own cheer leader!
Red is sexy, they say, so I bought a red car!
hahaha. That makes me both sexy and vain!
Picture above sekadar hiasan! (Fariz, Me, Haziq semasa bercuti di KK)
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