Will all married men or women who have never had a fight with your spouse, please raise your hands!
Okay, I only see one hand in the audience.
"Tell me ma'am, how do you manage not to have a fight?"
Silence and lots of blinking.
"Oh, okay. How many years have you been married ma'am?"
A smile across her face. Then rather shyly she answers, "Two months!"
The rest of the audience applause!
That, in itself is an achievement! I mean, to have two full months of marriage without any argument? Wow...such bliss!
The real secret to a happy marriage is to be able to argue as often it calls for, fight if necessary, and to be able to sit down afterwards and make up!
Couples who do not fight are often stressed and unhappy - even if outwardly they put up a happy front! These couples could be 'suffering' from one or more of the followings:
- Bottled up emotions, waiting to burst.
- Their relationship is so fragile, they fear any argument may break them up!
- They do not trust each other.
- Their love for each other are so conditional that they do not wish to risk offending one another.
- They simply do not how how to communicate their thoughts and opinions freely and objectively.
- Lots of compromises taking place in the relationship.
- Either one of them or both are having affairs outside their marriage.
...................and, the list can go on!
In having an argument, it helps greatly if both husband and wife follow some basic civilized rules such as showing respect, doing so in private, focusing on issues and not on the person, etc. Name calling (e.g.,fat ass, lazy bump), gross generalization (e.g., you are always messing the kitchen, you always want your way every time!) , and abusive language of any sort is a NO NO!
Some other side rules are;
> fight outside and make up inside the bedroom.
> fight in private, and make up in even more private place.
> fight fully clothed, and in making up keep an option to easily go naked!
> don't believe any advise that marriage is a 50 / 50 arrangement! A marriage is about two people giving their full 100 / 100 !
If you have secrets of your own, I hope you are happy to share!
sex after da fight is da best.the more tense or longer the fight, the steamier and longer is da sex
ReplyDeleteSOmetimes the name calling (eg. lazy bump, little piggy....etc) is a nick instead. but of course during the fight, some offensive words shd be avoided... ^^
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